Ever feel like society pushes us to be happy all the time? Like there’s no room for the heavier emotions? That’s part of why grieving feels so tough -it’s not exactly an emotion people celebrate, is it? But grief is just as human as joy. It’s messy, raw, and yes, downright uncomfortable!
When we lose someone close, or even experience a big life change, emotions can hit us like a whirlwind. Sadness, guilt, numbness, blame - it’s a lot and it doesn’t always make sense. You might even feel like you’re going mad or losing your grip. Spoiler alert: You’re not! Grief doesn’t follow a neat, logical path; it’s chaotic, like a storm inside your mind.
See our diagram below to gain insight into the chaotic cycle of grief;
And grief isn't just about losing someone. Ever felt strangely low after moving into a new home, starting a new job, or welcoming a child? That's grief too - the loss of the old to make way for the new. It's okay to feel torn, life's gains often come with some losses.
The truth is, you don't have to have it all together, pretending everything is fine so others feel comfortable - that's not doing you any favours. When feelings are bottled up, they often resurface later, sometimes manifesting as anxiety or depression, which can stem from unresolved grief.
Talking helps. Whether it's with friends or bereavement counselling, giving yourself permission to feel and share your emotions can make a world of difference. Grieving isn't about 'getting over it'; it's about making peace with it in your own time.
So, let's ditch the guilt about feeling sad. Let's stop thinking we "should" be happy just because the world expects it. Your emotions are valid - all of them!
If you would like to know more about how our counsellors in Plymouth can help with your loss, please give us a call or email and we'd be happy to answer any questions you might have.